You Gotta Do What You Gotta Do

Cold but true…

— From Dayo, as she experiences and learns. Welcome to The Mind Palace!

Photo by Kevin Bosc on Unsplash

I met an old friend recently, and while we caught up, I mentioned that I had been working with no proper rest in spite of being ill, and then said friend proceeded to say ‘‘you gotta do what you gotta do’’.

In other words, move on, stop complaining, such is life.

After bristling at the seeming insensitivity, I deeped it:

  • Why did I mention an illness in the first place? I wanted to be coddled.
  • Why did that reply instantly rub me the wrong way? It was the direct opposite of what I was looking for, with a hint that I was being indulgent.
  • But was the response justified? The question of being justified is somewhat irrelevant.

The truth is just as you are going through something, everyone is going through something (and don’t bother comparing pains, it’s bitterly useless). Everyone has a business to mind.

Yeah, that’s why we have loved ones, friends or family but aren’t there times when even they have their plates full?

No one is against you. People get busy, people have their own concerns to sort out, and there is simply no room for yours. And by all means, do not force them to create the room.

Go sort your own shit too. Go through the motions, and do what you gotta do. No point in failing on multiple ends when you can trim it to a few (or one).

You gotta do what you gotta do,


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Adedayo Adeyanju

Adedayo Adeyanju

I live, I learn, then I write. Welcome to my mind palace! Also on Substack: