Reason It Well
Enjoy moments so you don’t wonder if it was all worth it.
— From Dayo, as she experiences and learns. Welcome to The Mind Palace!
‘People are valuable.’
A friend told me that when I recounted how I wisely chose personal projects— that I honestly could do some other time — over having a time out with someone.
I presume, maybe wrongly, that this might not be widely relatable. Nonetheless, I’m here for the you and the me that ever expertly baulk at spending time, quality time, with people we say matter to us.
Yeah, we’re busy, but everyone is also busy. And a time will come when they get done with your shit.
‘Forget your friends and focus on your goals.’
Someone I regard as ambitious offered me that piece of advice.
And I get it. After removing the emotional fluff, no one desires your goals like you. So cut all the fluff and pursue doggedly. I get it.
I am also not obliged to listen to every piece of advice I receive. Why? Good intentions or not, we’re not all playing the same game.
Do I want to be successful yes? (I assume, maybe wrongly, that you want to also.)
But what is it all worth if I make it to the top and have no one to celebrate with?
I want to thrive and have loved ones to share the joys with, not only at the top but through every step of the journey.
Is it naive to expect that your family and friends will root for you every waking step? Yes, maybe even dangerous if you don’t handle disappointments well.
Is it well-meaning to want to make it so the crew gets to enjoy later? Yes, maybe.
I won’t bother arguing whether any is morally right or wrong.
I also won’t sit here to talk about the extremities of both statements or why I stand on my side of the fence.
It’s useless because we’re all playing different games.
I will end however that,
God forbid you lose focus and lapse,
God forbid you don’t put in the work required,
Just don’t forget to have a good laugh,
Just don’t forget to call so you never wish you did earlier,
Play it reasonable now so you never look back and wish you did it differently.
Stay loved, make someone feel loved,
A sombre writer,