Maintaining Your Peace and Other Bong Stuff

Adedayo Adeyanju
3 min readJan 29, 2022


Since we don’t see eye to eye, let’s stop seeing each other. That way, we’ll remove the source of stress.

What quality bong! (at least in this scenario. Nah, that’s a lie; ‘cutting people off’ is extreme to me)

How about we continue seeing each other but without our eyes so we won’t bother each other? (It makes sense, think about it).

Photo by REX WAY on Unsplash

I’m most definitely not going to delve into the mechanics of how problematic drama is, I just know I hate it. And in my opinion, cutting people off = drama. Maybe my take is a result of my current phase in life, maybe.

How about we talk it out? I don’t remember where I heard that ‘x is having a problem finding out not everything can be solved with a discussion’- ah yes, Hamilton! The song about the Constitutional Convention or close to it.

But back to basics. If we can’t talk it out, why can’t we find an amicable solution? Well, not every problem has a solution. I can’t even sigh. I’m not in a pot of beans, but Lord.

Sometimes, we make decisions because at the moment, one thing is of more priority, and no matter how much we may not want to, probably because we see that it’s hurting something, maybe a relationship or a friendship or a pet or a loved one, we’ll do it again. Again and again, because that one thing is just more important.

Sometimes, we know that when one thing is done, we’ll look back and wish we chose differently. But the choice has been made and the relationship fractured. No amount of grovelling or genuine regret can repair it. What’s done is done. But we’ll do it again. And if the other party gets offended or wounded or anything else, and takes a consequent action that shakes the foundation, or hell, scatter the pack of cards, then what a great loss. The loss might not be great, the loss might be out of something useless but it’s a loss nonetheless.

Speaking of losses, I’m reminded of a tweet I saw the other day of a lady who wanted to go for her masters abroad but her boyfriend was against it and somehow (not every tweet has a backstory) turned the situation into a boyfriend vs masters abroad decision. Now, I’m not in a relationship and still young enough to not consider it a priority of any sort, maybe that’s affecting my choice and reason for it but good heavens, what a laugh-for-days worthy question.

Back to where we were, again. Sometimes, is it really a loss or good riddance. Is it?

Might want to ask yourself if the decision you’re about to make is really worth it well after you’ve come down from your high of emotion. Is it worth it? If it is not, backtrack before you destroy something, and if it is, then, by all means, lead the way. I did something tonight; I chose and I’ll choose again. Again and again.

I lowkey don’t like the fact that this is somewhat a journal entry instead of informative stuff I want to write about (and goodness me, the number of English rules I’ve broken here) but this is my entry for the week and heck, it’s my mind palace!

If I write in bits over the many days, I’ll have better quality works.

Still. Back to this: ‘How about we continue seeing each other but without our eyes so we won’t bother each other?’ That means, respectable distancing. Not everyone is okay but isn’t that better and more amicable?

Until next time,




Adedayo Adeyanju

I live, I learn, then I write. Welcome to my mind palace! Now only on Substack: